One of the many terrible things about depression is that there is nothing left over, after the struggle to simply remain alive, for any other concerns. Those of us who live with a sufferer feel this keenly. It's why I write this blog. Maybe it's why you're reading it.
But there's no energy for other kinds of engagement either. One of the things that I love about J is his deep sense of social responsibility. He cares a great deal about social justice. We don't always agree on everything but I love his passion. Or I loved it until it went the way of so many other good things.
Since he's been on the up again it's been amazing to see this quality start to re-emerge. On the weekend we went to a rally to support gay marriage. I was ready to go without him (T and I are used to that).
So it was fantastic to stand side by side with J in the cause of something we believe in. It was amazing to see him with enough energy to care about a thing, to leave the house for it.
We were with friends and I wanted to say, look, there he is, this is the man I love. I know they must wonder about why our relationship still exists. I think they know a little better now.
"We were with friends and I wanted to say, look, there he is, this is the man I love. I know they must wonder about why our relationship still exists."
ReplyDeleteOh, I can so relate to that!
I'm very glad that J is continuing to do better.
Does J use any medication, and if he does, does it help? My husband tried medication a few years ago and had a bad experience with three different typesm which put him completely off the idea. But (as he sees me nearing the end of my rope) he's showing signs of being willing to try again, with a different doctor's supervision. Does anyone here have pro/con feelings about this?
It's so fantastic to read that things are going well for the both of you. Long may it continue. x
ReplyDeleteThanks for your good wishes Gappy & SNY. I wish it had continued longer but I know we'll get there again - sooner rather than later if the trend continues.
ReplyDelete@SNY - J isn't on any medication. He also had a bad experience with a couple of them and hasn't wanted to try them again. He was on Chinese medicinal herbs for a long while and they seemed to have a great effect. He's not on anything now.
Please keep me posted on how things work out on that front.